Ok, well not everyone, just me. Most of these are aimed at me and clearly make me sound stupid and a little on the wrong side of the sunshine bus... however as I am feeling generous I will allow my current situation (which is actually situated in the middle of the sunshine bus - wearing a rainbow hat may I add) to provide you with the safe knowlegde that it indeed, COULD BE WORSE FOR YOU!!

I clearly am not short of brackets so here are a few more for your enjoyment and giggles. If you dont find this funny then you clearly are a miserable bitch (as Billy would say) ()()()()() (They are your brackets by the way)

Anyway! To the point................ some giggles at my expense because whilst everyone else is taking the piss out of me today, I want to join in too!

0.5. Turnip, Billy and Lou all sat in a taxi. Lou is last in and has the very responsible job of closing the door. The driver was giving her instructions on how to close said door. Wasnt working. Queue a scream from Lou to her father (who was stood across the road, up the garden path and actually in the house) "daaaaaaad!!!". Dad actually comes out!!!! Taxi driver gets out and slams the door.

1. On discussing the locking of the door sitution:
Dad: Are you gonna bother with keys tonight?
Me: Duno, depends if he's gonna be there or not
Dad: WTF?

2. Billy being a greedy barstool and stealing Turnips pitcher in the pub
Turnip: get your sloppy chops off my jug!!!!!
(lol!!)

3. In the car about to leave Westfest
Chris: Lou can you move that flyer from under my windscreen wiper on your side?
Lou: *attempts to reach through the glass* and says "ouch"

4. In the car at the services
Chris: Lou are you getting out or staying in?
Lou: *looks around* yes i need a wee... how do I get out?
Lou: pls ignore what you just heard

5. In the car on the way home
Chris: *has one hand on the wheel, whilst one hand plays with his hair (NB Head hair)*
Lou and Turnip: bursts into a chant of IM A LITTLE TEAPOT!
(very much a have-to-be-there moment)

6. A phone conversation with a friend in which we were debating which yogurts pots would be most useful for skis (if we were midgets of course). I still settle with "I will use fruit corner skis so I can leave my bits and bobs in my fruit basket.

7. Chatting about my dark haired dark skinned "friend" having a baby with a Turkish man
Lou: Yeah shes half Turk, but the Dad did a runner apparently.
Dad: And a blonde Turkish baby at that!!!!!!
Mum: Bet it wasn't even a Turk.
Lou: Well as the rhyme at school went: "Nina, Nina, Nina from Heanor, Everybody has been inbetween her.
Dad: Poor child.
(thats probably not gona be funny, if you knew my dad it would be)

8. 2 hrs later Turnip had STILL not finished writing her text. Earlier in the day Chris accussed Lou of living in a Barn after leaving the car door open several times.
Lou: I reckon you and me, Turnip, should never ever live on a boat together.
Turnip: Why not?
Lou: Well with my leaving doors open, the water would get in and you would never actually send the Mayday, therefore, we would die. Thats why.
Turnip. Oh.

8. Billy lying down reading Ravin Eye
Lou: Are you sleepy?
Billy: No im reading the ravin eye
Lou: oooh get you and your college eductaion.
(hmmmm?)

Back at mine after Westfest (baring in mind I am clearly the easy target today as not only were my friends Billy, Turnip and Chris being abusive but my own flesh and blood by name of Mum and Dad were joining in to!!!!!) several insults and a shattered and bleeding emotional heart later, My personal favourite:

Mum: I really like your outfit, your starting to get the figure of Maryln Monroe. She was curvy and seen as a sex icon
Me: But I look nothing like Maryln Monroe!
Mum: Well no of course you dont, Marilyn Monroe is dead!
Queue Billy, Turnip, Chris, Mum and Dad wetting themselves blatently taking advantage of my battered emotional state and fragile fragile self :(

I am only sharing this because at this moment in time i find the whole thing rather amusing. Tomorrow I'll wonder, as with most, what the fuk was i on about??

Anyways, thats the end of my totally pointless post.

Im off to clean my sunshine bus.

PS as per my total loss of recalling the phrase "text message" I had to refer to my texts as Written Phonecalls. This is so going to be the in thing you know... Every cool person will use it. Standard.

leeds ooh could do, its a good old night out there isnt it??
know what you mean about being busy like its been bloody old chaos like
erm yeah im alive for a chat lol, well no my voice has come back lol
too much shouting and screaming at messfest lol xx

Give you a bell later then hun!! xx

omg i love ur profile pik!!! haha we are like HOT STUFF


mish!!! me and u were on about doing somehting in Leeds sometime soon..................!!

was thinking that myself babe
hahahaha
messy minds think alike lol

That would be mental!! haha Froot be great to see you too!! :) Mish so sorry didnt call on Weds been ill!! Will call over the weekend!! xx

Haha what Me and Mish together??? Indeed. And yes, it would be after all these years!! :D

Years? Surely not? haha


That has just got random written all over it!! ;) x

4 of them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


hehe ask her about the crumpets :P

ha ha ha ha ha ha bring on the crumpets and tea and maybe even biscuits
what about the lil umberellas you are putting on the crumpets lmfao
should be a good oldmessy night

Bloody hell... unbelievable how quick time flies!! haha


Bring on the trumpets... sorry crumpets! I love crumpets! Awesome stuff!!! Would be awesome to see you both, are you going to come?? xx

I have a talent with those.... see?? I decided what with all the Global Warming warnings we should use the sexy lil things for good use...



They're also good for protecting you from unprotected plastic sperm




defoo!!! And Lukeylukerson is up for joining us too at some point I think....


swooonsum!
for me it dpends im a busy bee from now til xmas but the wkend im going to stay with mish is whichever wkend is nearest to the 12th xx

im up for it miss froot on said weekend lol
im guna be rather messy fook it and why not
bring on the crumpets



oh yes they look rather nice
and the umberella sperm protector that is bloody genius lol

What happended to you two Friday night? haha x

I got kidnapped and got to stroke my friends rat. Wasnt out of its cage for long though.

Duno about her... shes preparing my teapots and plates for crumpet time.

What happened Friday for you then Hoopz? Why you ask?x

Kidnapping is always good!! :)


I was DJing in Leeds babe!!! :) x

OOOOOOOOOOOOOH shizzer i didnt realise it was so soon :S

Never mind my lovely!! There will be another time!! ;) x

oops does that mean we are in deep shizzle as louise so nicely put it??


im on the case of getting some top notch tea to chug down with the crumpets

we need to get good and messy lol

wooooooop!! I may have a friend up for joinin if u want a +1 lol?

who me???
will that be a male or female friend????
bring em all along lol