Did God really rest on the 7th day? Did he bollocks - he raved man! He continued to rave so fucking hard (coz y'know he can - I mean this guy's God & he sure as hell (oops) don't need sleep!) that in his delirious state he forgot to dress Adam & Eve in hot pants & fluffys! And that's why they were naked! Or they'd been shagging in the toilets & been robbed of their clothes. Or something like that.

Anyway, so Adam & Eve banged each other away for hours on end (just high on life obviously) - well ok until Adam's do dah shrivelled up like a prune - & 9 months later (Eve stopped raving after 5 months from a bad back, and it was funny how she suddenly went off prunes) out popped the first of God's cyber children. He loved to stomp around in Cyberdog's latest kids range (this kid had impeccable taste. But not sure who the shop assistant would be if he was only the third person on earth. Hmmm. Oh well, the creation story's full of holes anyway!).

It was a shame for him really coz God buggered up a bit on this one coz the poor lad's girlfriend by default had to be his sister (or his mother - perhaps he was into older birds?). Fortunatley God had remembered to plant the poppy seeds on about the 4th day, which gave them enough time to grow (thanks to the rain & ability to photosynthesise that God also created - clever huh? - what with him never having even had one bloody biology lesson!) & the hallucinogenic effect of the by product was enough to ensure the incest was not too much of an issue. Which was handy really coz it would have made me bloody throw up!

Right, now perhaps the plot's been lost a bit here (last night did get a bit messy to be honest), but basically all the cyber kids shagged all the other cyber kids (well, they're not gunna shag scallies are they. And was it Adam or Eve that carried the ginger gene? Hmmm.) and eventually I was born to bathe the world in a dazzling fluorescent aura.

I love all that is cyber. I love all music that is hard. I bloody love that I was born with a natural inclination to stomp (and no I don't dance like I'm in a bloody boy band - you know who you are!!).

Is there more to life than that? I think not.

Big love x

Myki ;op

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